How does the app work?

There's no wall and no willpower involved. You name one person you trust as your Clamp. The app flags activity by category on your phone. Your Clamp gets a weekly bulletin showing counts by gambling/speculation category — never an app or venue name.

What is the rank ladder?

A clean streak earns a rank that climbs through seven rungs: Degenerate (0 days), Smooth Brain (1–2 days), Paper Hands (3–6 days), Bagholder (7–13 days), Your Wife's Boyfriend (14–29 days), Diamond Hands (30–59 days), and Highly Regarded (60+ days), which is the highest rank despite the name. Each week your Clamp sees your rank, whether you moved up or down, and the category counts. Any incident resets your streak to zero — no partial credit — and you start the climb again from Degenerate.

How It Works

There’s no wall to climb over and no willpower to run out of. There’s a scoreboard, and there’s one person who can see it. That’s the whole app.

You name a Clamp — the one person you’d least like to disappoint. The app watches for flagged activity. Your Clamp finds out. You can delete an app in a weak moment; you cannot un-tell someone who already knows.

What counts, and what your Clamp sees

The app sorts activity into a category right on your phone. A count goes up when you spend time in a watched app — on Android once a stretch of use passes about twenty seconds, on iOS as the day’s running total in a category crosses roughly the 2-, 10- and 30-minute marks. Either way a count is time spent, not a bet placed. What reaches your Clamp is counts by gambling/speculation category, coarse session-length buckets, a rank that reflects your clean-day streak, and a week-over-week trend — never an app or venue name, a website, or your screen.

The Rank Ladder

The rank is the headline of every bulletin. Stay clean and you build a streak. Your streak earns you a rank. The ranks climb. The names do not get more flattering. Seven rungs, and everyone starts at the bottom.

60+ days Highly Regarded the top rank — yes, really. Our highest classification, despite sounding like an insult.
30–59 days Diamond Hands a full month-plus of white-knuckle restraint. The urge came, the urge left, and you are still here.
14–29 days Your Wife's Boyfriend two weeks clean. Somebody had to step up while you were busy not relapsing.
7–13 days Bagholder a week in, holding the position even though it hurts. Down bad, holding anyway. Respect.
3–6 days Paper Hands still shaky, but the paper is getting thicker. The first week is the hardest, and you are in it.
1–2 days Smooth Brain a day or two clean. Smooth, frictionless, and a wrinkle is starting to form. Protect it.
0 days Degenerate where everyone starts, and where everyone returns.

Day bands shown are current targets and will be tuned as the app meets real-world data. Calibration is the responsibility of Ben Overbich, Tier Threshold Calibration Lead (ext. 4410). He has assured us the numbers are correct. We have elected to believe him.

Any incident resets your streak to zero. No partial credit. You start the climb again from Degenerate. We attempted to build in a grace day. We were unable.

What your Clamp actually sees

Your accountability partner sees counts by gambling/speculation category, never an app or venue name.

Electric Nipple Clamps watches the named apps you put on your own watch list, on this device. Web activity is not visible in this version — anything you open in a browser, or in an in-app browser inside Reddit, Instagram, X, Facebook, TikTok and similar, is not counted. Every bulletin carries that limitation on its face; an expanded coverage scope is on the roadmap.

Categorization is performed on your device by matching the app in the foreground against the watch list you built; no outside classification service is used. Your accountability partner sees counts by gambling/speculation category, never an app or venue name.

Exactly what we do and don’t see →